Being Me.

Its hard. You want to please people but sometimes, maybe most times, you'd go around unnoticed. And all you do is just suck it in. People say shit things, do shit things to me, smile. Smile, I've got nothing to lose. SMILE. That's how I get through my days. Don't do shit to others. Just smile. It gives me a little bit of hope. It always does. Makes me think that eventually, I'll be alright. Forgive. That's right. And sometimes, forget. I'm like a plastic bag with holes. You fill me with water and at the same time, I'm getting rid of them as well. Some people don't do that. They don't have holes. Once it's full, they'll just spill out everything. I'm never full. But if things keep coming to me very fast, I just might. I hope that won't happen though. Only my best friends, old friends know who I really am. I ain't so tough, so rugged. Not really. I ain't those with certain people. I am in fact gentle, very loving. (: 
Its been a long time since I had a partner, boyfriend. Well, all my past boyfriends, they ain't so boyfriend-y. 
What am I saying? People don't even look at me. Boys. They don't look at me. Like damn. Whatever. I'm so over this. I'm not going to look for anyone now. It's nice though being single. You can sleep for longer hours and not think of anyone at night that makes you go crazy. But then, being able to do that, I think it's a nice feeling. A good kind of crazy. Maybe it's nice. But when? Heck, I'm still young. Fuck all this feelings and shit. I'm single and I'm loving it. For now.

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